Do you like to always be busy – and ‘go with the flow’ each day? Or do you prefer quiet times at home – and function better with a little structure to your day?
It doesn’t matter – either way is perfect, if it works for you and your family. What doesn’t work is trying to parent in a way that doesn’t suit your personality.
There is a huge amount of information and advice for parents about how to raise children, and it can be easy to fall into the trap of striving to be ‘super-parents’ – and losing sight of your natural parenting style along the way.
While there is nothing wrong with wanting to learn and improve your parenting skills, it is important to believe in the abilities you already have.
Good enough parents!
Children don’t need perfect parents. It’s a lot to live up to, and a bit of a shock when they get out in the real world and have to mix with a whole lot of imperfect people! What children do need are ‘good enough’ parents. Parents who know they are doing their best and can recognise when they have made a mistake – and learn from it. Parents who like themselves and don’t need the approval of their friends, colleagues or neighbours. Parents who believe in themselves and are strong in their personal values and beliefs. Parents who love and care for their children. Parents just like you!
There’s no comparison
Don’t measure yourself or your family against other parents and children. It’s a bit like comparing apples and bananas – they’re both fruits, but each has a completely unique make-up and purpose. There is no way that one could ever be the same as the other! Believe in yourself and your abilities as a parent – and you’ll find parenting a lot easier and more enjoyable.
It’s also important to remember that when you don’t believe in your parenting abilities, you not only undermine your own self-esteem, but you limit your effectiveness as a confident role model to your child. If you want your child to grow up believing in themselves and their abilities – show them how!